The Monday Pep Talk - How to maximize the good times

INNER BEAUTY

When something good happens, or someone pays you a compliment, how long do you bask in its glow? Honestly. This is something to think about since most of us just brush it away, while dwelling over negative comments instead. Many people only allow themselves a fleeting moment of pleasure (I am definitely one of them but I am aware of the imbalance and try to remind myself in basking a little bit longer). Prolong these moments as much as you can, if done gradually it will feel more doable and natural. Happiness is vital for our health. Saying thank you and complementing others are two other tricks to make you feel more happy.

If we want to thrive in life we must not only learn from bad times, but also learn from the good times, says the authors of Resilience: The greatest Science of Mastering Life's greatest Challenges to Red Magazine. It's all about MAXIMISING THE GOOD TIMES.

Here's what you can do when something good happens to you:

1. Give yourself credit for whatever part you played in making it happened.

2. Feel grateful for the part you didn´t play in it, wether for other people contributing or just simple good luck.

3. Think of ways that can expand the length and scope of this positive event and implement them.

So, if we only do one thing this week...let's cultivate to be happy and flourish! 

This post was originally published in February 2013

(Images from Pinterest via 1 maisonsblanches.tumblr.com 2 emphasisadded.tumblr.com)

Colours & style according to sign

Cashmere in earthy tones. Image from vraiandoro.tumblr.com

OUTER BEAUTY
Sometimes horoscopes and astrology are more accurate than others, like colours and styles for the zodiacs by Susie Cox for Tory Burch blog. This one made me laugh out loud, and totally agree with just about everything. Being a taurus I could hardly describe my style better having a wardrobe full of earthy nude colours, soft pink and, a lot of blue...(other than that I´d like to add some glitter and feathers for a party twist to all the earthy nude colours). Check out your own sign here.

Taurus (April 21 – May 21)
The color for Taurus is blue or earth Tones. Taurus is an earth sign and feels more comfortable with a more classic style. They are not prone to trendy, hip or crazy fashion. I call Taurus the “sign of cashmere.” They like the best quality with the finest fabrics. The typical Taurus has tender skin and needs soft fabric. Their closets are filled with classic pieces that will last forever.

Acceptance - relief - gratitude

INNER BEAUTY - THE MONDAY PEP TALK
This is something that have really served me well. It didn´t really hit me until quite recently, actually. And I can tell you, it´s such a relief. I think in acceptance lies relief in some sort. Resistance takes a lot of energy to hold up. When we accept (whatever it is we need to accept/work on) we start to see things in another light and life can take the direction that it´s maybe suppose to take. And if we´re really lucky then come gratitude. And who knows, maybe even some bliss. I´m working on it. This is one of the wisdoms that probably comes with age for all of us at a certain point...

Happy Monday!

Living mindfully

INNER BEAUTY - THE MONDAY PEP TALK
In her great book "Thrive", Arianna Huffington talks a lot about the importance of incorporating mindfulness into our lives. And this is something that should come naturally and be every day present. These are some of her words from the book upon the subject that I think resonate very well and says a lot about the concept mindfulness:

"One of the best - and most easily available - ways we can become healthier and happier is through mindfulness. When I first heard about mindfulness, I was confused. My mind was already full enough, I thought. I  needed to empty it, not focus on it. My conception of the mind was sort of like the household junk drawer - just keep cramming things in and hope it doesn't jam. Then I read Jon Kabat-Zinn's writing on mindfulness and it all made sense. In Asian languages, he wrote, the word for mind and the word for heart are the same word. So when we hear the word mindfulness, we have to inwardly also hear heartfulness in order to grasp it even as a concept, and especially as a way of being. Mindfulness is not just about our minds but our whole beings. When we are all mind, things can get rigid. When we are all heart, things can get chaotic. Both lead to stress. But when they work together, the heart leading through empathy, the mind guiding us with focus and attention, we become a harmonious being." 

5 Ways to get out of your mind [HAPPINESS]

INNER BEAUTY     

The fabulous Huffington Post recently shared five tips for how to get out your mind, and into happiness. Because this is really what it´s about, getting out of your mind for a while. As Zen teacher Alan Watts said; "We all need to go out of our minds at least once a day. By going out of our minds we quickly come to our senses." I totally agree with this. Here are five highly effective ways from Ed and Deb Shapiro to help you go out of your mind and in  to happiness, as told to Huffington Post where you can read the whole article: 

1. Pay attention By being mindful, you can witness the madness of your mind without identifying with or becoming it; you see that who you are is more than just your thoughts and feelings.

2. Make friends with fear Being fearful of fear keeps it an enemy, while befriending it turns it to fearlessness.

3. Forgive yourself It's natural to make mistakes; none of us get it right all the time. Forgiving yourself for being human enables you to let go and move on more quickly.

4. Turn shit into gold Transform difficult or dark times into rich experiences that generate greater insight and wisdom.

5. Meditate daily, even for five minutes It really will change you from being a victim of your own mind into a victor. 

A great start to the day [according to Diane von Furstenberg]

INNER BEAUTY

The beautiful and ever inspiring fashion designer Diane von Furstenberg told Elin Kling about the first thing she does every morning:

"- First I try to meditate but I am not very good at it. Then I like to send an email that helps someone other than myself. Sometimes it is introducing two people or just sending a nice compliment, but it should be something that has nothing to do with me."

Note to self; what a wonderful way to start the day!

The Monday Pep Talk | 3 Keywords for youthful living [Deepak Chopra on WSJ]

INNER BEAUTY
We all want to live forever, right. Or at least lead a long life. And with a purpose. And also look young throughout our whole life...Recently The Wall street Journal interviewed the holistic expert and bestselling author Deepak Chopra on their tv channel WSJ Live. The subject was how to have a youthful outlook on life according to Deepak Chopras new "age reversal concept". Deepak Chopra told WSJ about our different ages, which isn´t one but three. There are the chronological age, of course. Then the biological age, meaning how old your body is according to health, exercise and living that can be measured by your doctor. The third age is called the psychological age, and this is how old you actually feel (also my personal favourite since I will never, ever really feel old...) All these three needs to be looked at together when talking about age. Deepak Chopra also went on to tell how science now can show evidence that meditation actually influences, in a positive way, the biological age. And Deepak Chopra says that "if you really want to get old, you shall not worry about it. You have to have flow, feel the flow, instead of worry." This message is vital for getting old, according to Deepak Chopra. The corner stones or key words in life if you want to get old, and what one should build one's life around are; meaning, purpose and contribution. These three words or concepts are what to focus on throughout life for a longer and more youthful living. I really enjoyed this interview, getting a few reminders here and there...like doing more meditation (yes, again...), not worrying so much (some days I tend to worry more and some days I feel very stable, note to self; get more of those not-worrying-days) and pay attention to create the famous flow. The WSJ interview is longer and much more giving than what I´ve summarised here, so have a look for yourself here.

Show yourself some love today

Happy Valentines, dear reader!

INNER BEAUTY
If you´ve read this blog for some time you know we don´t only talk about self-esteem anymore, we talk a lot about self-love these days since that´s the term du jour. I think these words from Dr. Habib Sadeghi as told to Goop, where you can read the whole article, are so true and inspiring. Start with forgiveness. Of oneself. And what better day to do that than on Valentines? Show yourself some love and then spread it further. 

"Love affects the body in profound ways, but it's not enough just to receive it: We must be able to generate that energy within ourselves if we are to maintain our health. To achieve this, we can't begin at self-love but at self-forgiveness—forgiveness for not being a certain body weight, beauty type, Mother of the Year, the perfect daughter, wife, or anything else. When women let themselves off the hook, they will acquiesce into a place of self-acceptance. It is only in acceptance that we learn what love is. When love is the nourishment we're using to seed our soul, our lives become fertile in all areas again. There's no need to fear the future because we know that so long as constant change is life's nature, survival doesn't go to the fittest, but to the most resilient—and resiliency always resides in the richest soil.”    Dr Habib Sadeghi to Goop

[Text source Goop. Image from Pinterest via zsazsabellagio

The happy girl [Gabrielle Bernstein]

INNER BEAUTY

Maybe you´ve already heard about her. Since this self-development guru preaching self-love for a happy and fulfilled life is everywhere, even blogging for ELLE, who says about Gabrielle Bernstein; "So long, Carrie Bradshaw—there’s a new role model for go-getting thirtysomethings. Gabrielle Bernstein is doling out inner peace and self-love for the postmodern spiritual set." I have read two of her books and really like them, as I find her both inspirational and entertaining. Gabrielle Bernstein has a background as a successful PR executive in NYC nightlife, a life not very similar of her life today. But that story is important to know to get her message. 

The Monday Pep Talk | Gifts of imperfection

"Belonging starts with self-acceptance...

Believing that you're enough
is what gives you the courage
to be authentic."

—  Brené Brown

INNER BEAUTY
We all want to fit in. We all want to belong. Those are kind of the same thing, right? According to Brené Brown, they´re not. She has spent the last 12 years researching this subject at the University of Houston. She has also published the book "The gifts of imperfection". Brené Brown talks to Oprah about "Life lessons we all need to learn":

- Fitting in, I've discovered during the past decade of research, is assessing situations and groups of people, then twisting yourself into a human pretzel in order to get them to let you hang out with them. Belonging is something else entirely—it's showing up and letting yourself be seen and known as you really are. Many of us suffer from this split between who we are and who we present to the world in order to be accepted. But we're not letting ourselves be known, and this kind of incongruent living is soul-sucking.

Daily wise words to reflect upon [The DailyOM]

Make sure you aren’t running away from your problems, 

always moving towards something.

INNER BEAUTY
Have you checked out the new section here at Beautifulosophy to your right, called Today's DailyOM? Every day you get a new life wisdom here from the DailyOM team. As much as I love (and need!) fashion, beauty, glamour and light entertainment I know it´s best when it´s balanced with some reflection and mindfulness as well. It´s all about being fulfilled, which can only truly come from both sides. So those days when you feel the need for it, I know I have days when I definitely need it and days when I don´t, you can always find some wise words to reflect upon in your own life. 

From Todays DailyOM:
There are times when change - moving to a new city or a new home, or changing careers - is the right thing at the right time. But there are also times when the urge for change is really just a desire to run away from problems that need to be faced rather than avoided. These are the kinds of problems that recur in our lives. For example, issues with coworkers that seem to arise at every job we take, or repeatedly getting into unhealthy relationships. A move might temporarily distract us, and even cure the problem for a time, simply by taking us out of the situation in which the problem fully manifested itself. However, the problem will eventually appear again in our new situation. 

One way to make sure you aren’t running away from your problems is to notice whether you are moving towards something that is exciting in its own right, as opposed to something that is appealing only because it is not where you are now. 

Read the whole text

[Image from swoonworthyblog.blogspot.se]

The Monday Pep Talk

INNER BEAUTY
Even though it´s still a national holiday in Sweden today, I know I could use a Monday pep talk for my thoughts for 2014. I love this simple yet very true quote from one of the pioneers in motivational thinking. I have high expectations for this new year and will try my best to make it a HAPPY one. Setting the right goals is one crucial thing. For me right goals means realistic goals, since I tend to dream away a bit too much. Last year was a lot about being (or rather getting) grounded. Now that I´m aware of this it´s much easier to stop and ask myself if this is realistic and doable, yet still it has to be inspirational...

“If you want to be happy, 

set a goal that commands your thoughts, 

liberates your energy, and inspires your hope.” 

-Andrew Carnegie

[Image fromcrushculdesac.tumblr.com]

Happy New 2014!

INNER BEAUTY

Do you have any new years resolutions? This time of year I´d like to take the possibility to rethink the year that has gone by, and set new goals and keywords for the new to come. Still thinking about it this year though...but I think 2014 will be something about staying true to yourself, being authentic, self-expression, (dare to) follow your intuition and finding real happiness even in the little things, themes that have characterised my 2013 already but can be taken further in 2014. I also realise that since I´ve checked the box of having a family, being (hmm just over) 40 many of my goals nowadays revolve around my own self-development and career choices to have a fulfilled life in that area as well. What are your resolutions, themes or keywords for 2014...?

The Monday Pep Talk | Cultivate your inner star quality

INNER BEAUTY
There are many ways to bring out your own inner star quality. Here are 30 ways to help cultivate it. Some of them we may already do regularly, some needs to be reminded of and some may be new...

What do the stars have in store for 2014?

INNER BEAUTY

I´m a Taurus, and very much so. For many of us, this time of year means throwing ourselves over next year's horoscope:) The stars have told us about the future since ancient times, and what better time to check out what the stars have in store for us than at the end of the year beginning a new, promising one? Then it´s up to each and one of us what to believe. The important thing is to read quality horoscopes by well-known educated astrologers, otherwise there really is no point. 

Here are some of the best horoscopes to check out for your own sign:

Astrology.com

Jonathan Cainer

Shirley Maclaine intuitive astrologers
Terry Nazon
AstrologyZone by Susan Miller

{Image from Pinterest via aquestcostat.tumblr.com}

7 Habits of grateful people

It´s the little things...

INNER BEAUTY
Being grateful has many advantages. Even science show real proof how this affects our health. This is of course not done just over a day. Huffington Post have shared seven habits of grateful people to copy paste into your own life if you´re not already doing it. This list also got me reflecting over my own habits. What about you? And read the whole article in Huffington Post here.

1 Write a journal
Writing a gratitude journal is great, but rather time consuming. Instead I try to just think it through when going to sleep.

2 Don´t avoid the negative
This is very real and important. Our lives will always have some negative influences, and just being "positive" about everything isn´t always the answer. To get to the real positive side of life we sometimes have to go throw negative emotions and recognise them. (And when you´re done; pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick and pull yourself together:)

The Monday Pep Talk | Slowing down with Oprah

INNER BEAUTY

Today many people all over the world practice some sort of meditation. In business life there are several successful people practising meditation for clarity and inner peace in a stressful and busy environment. As an impatient type A-personality I wish I was doing it more often for stress release, clarity, inner feel good and strength. With a little toddler around there isn´t enough time for this, but one day...If you´re curious about meditation Oprah today launches a 21 day online meditation challenge with herself and Deepak Chopra as guides. It´s free to join and last time Oprah did this a whooping 650 000 people joined the program. This meditation challenge is about "true love and miraculous relationships". 

"Fall in love with yourself. Fall in love with life. Join us on August 5 for a transformational three-week guided meditation journey into the heart of true love. Discover the wonder that exists within and then watch all of your relationships unfold effortlessly, easily, and miraculously" Oprah promises.

[Image from Pinterest further source unknown]

The destination of a lifetime

INNER BEAUTY
"I´m a firm believer that travel does wonders for the spirit, and I don´t just mean the kind that involves visiting faraway places. There´s a particular journey anyone can take - a destination that isn´t reachable by airplane or automobile. I´m talking about the kind of travel that requires years to complete: the journey to your most fulfilled self, says Oprah.

Summer time is...

My weekend...

INNER BEAUTY
I´m very good at this. Il dolce far niente. This isn´t something I´m up to very often though. But once in a while those moments come. And I´m proud to say that I (nowadays) really cherish these moments. It´s a necessary life saver. I believe this has the same health impact as meditation and mindfulness (ok, almost). This is my summer mindfulness.

75 ways to live a HAPPY LIFE

INNER BEAUTY

There are endless ways of living a positive life. It´s of course highly individual. Above all I think it´s important to recognise what creates a positive and happy living for oneself. To create some core values for happiness to live by. The happiness expert Dani from postively present sums up her 75 best ways to live a positively present life:

1. Love yourself first. 

2. Live in the present moment. 

3. Don’t ignore the past. 

4. Look for the good in everyone. 

5. Don’t believe everything you think. 

6. Be honest with yourself.